Theif, Liar, Gentleman
by British.Rainbows
Summary: Alfred can't find his lucky boxers anywhere on the day of a big meeting and Arthur denies knowing where they are. Sorry I suck at summaries. Rated T to be safe, slight yaoi, not-so-slight USUK.


Disclaimer: Do not own, wish I did, all that jazz. The characters belong to Hidekaz Himaruya, and the show belongs to whatever publishing agent is getting it out there right now.

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Thief, Liar, Gentleman

Alfred was scrambling to be ready for the meeting. Arthur, on the other hand was poised and ready, reviewing his notes at Alfred's table once more. Sure, Alfred's notes were done (and with minimal food stains on them), but he couldn't find what he was looking for anywhere. "Come on, Alfred, think. Where did you have them last?" He muttered under his breath, lifting up sofa cushions and looking under the furniture. Frantic, he called out to Arthur. "Hey, Iggy, have you seen my lucky boxers?" He scrambled back into the kitchen to watch Arthur sipping a mug of coffee calmly, but with a scowl of distaste firmly upon his face.

"No, Alfred, I have not seen your drawers, nor do I care to."

"Oh, I thought maybe I had left them at your place after the last meeting. And I know you're anal about cleaning."

"I am not! You're the one who leaves everything in piles all over the place. I mean, honestly, I had to walk over three small mountains of clothes and an even larger one of junk food wrappers just to get to my room, which was coated in dust!"

Alfred snickered. "Serves you right."

Arthur scowled at this. "If you don't hurry along, we're going to be late. Actually, I believe I'll walk to the meeting. If I leave now, I should still make it before you."

"What! No way! You can't beat a hero!" Alfred picked up his chaotic pile of papers. "We'll go. My presentation will probably just fail now, thanks to you."

"Don't you dare blame me for your lack of organization." Arthur quickly downed the rest of his coffee, wrinkling his nose at the taste. "And next time we have a meeting here, remind me to bring a good supply of tea, I don't think I can manage to drink another cup of this sludge." He picked up his neat stack of papers and headed out to the car, climbing into what would have been the driver's seat on his side of the ocean and reaching for the wheel that wasn't there. "Bugger all." He growled irritably, buckling in instead.

Alfred raced out to the car, burger hanging out of his mouth and keys dangling from his pinky finger. He yanked open the door and climbed in, forcing his papers on Arthur and jamming the keys in the ignition. "Oi! Watch where you put those, git!" Arthur yelled, attempting to sort his notes from Alfred's and put Alfred's into a manageable pile. Alfred shrugged and backed out of the driveway in fast, jerky movements. "Would you _please_ learn to drive? You're going to get us killed!"

"Oh, shut UP, Artie." Alfred drove to the building at a speed that was much too high for Arthur's comfort. When they finally arrived, Alfred had managed to almost wreck the car three times and Arthur's face was white and drawn. Shakily, he stepped out of the car and sat down on the ground. "Hey, Artie, come on! You were the one worried about being late, don't just sit there!" He said, unwrapping another burger and pressing a button on his car remote to lock the vehicle. He yanked Arthur up from under his armpits and helped him stand. Taking his papers back from Arthur, he half-ran into the building. Arthur followed him shakily.

"Ah, guten tag, America. It is a surprise that you are here before England." Ludwig stated as Alfred raced into the room, beaming.

"Well, I'm just that awesome." Alfred stated as Arthur walked stiffly into the room, still shaking a little.

"Igirisu-san? What has happened?" Kiku asked quietly, watching the small blonde with worry.

"Alfred. Drive. Car." Arthur squeaked out, heading over to his seat and sitting down, still pale.

"Ah, mon cher, I will help you get over that if you'll follow me to that lovely closet on the way here." That snapped Arthur out of it.

"In your bloody dreams, frog!" He hollered, color rapidly returning to his face as he glowered at said Frenchman. "I do believe everyone is here, may we please just start. The less time I have to spend with this daft fool, the better."

Ludwig nodded and the presentations began. True to his word, Alfred's presentation was by far the worst of the group, mainly due to the food that was constantly crammed in his mouth. A few times, small bits had gone flying and hit some of the other attendees of the meeting. When the time had come to finally go home, the majority of the nations were out the door in seconds. Arthur, Alfred, Ludwig, and Feliciano were the only bodies left in the room. Arthur finished straightening up his papers while Alfred bugged him. As he stood up, one of his papers slipped from its folder. Bending over, he picked it up and tucked it back into his folder.

Alfred did a double take. He couldn't have just seen what he had thought he saw. Arthur was _not_ wearing his lucky boxers. No wonder Artie's presentation was so good! He had stolen Al's luck! Oh, Arthur was definitely going to get it when they got back to his place, because Alfred was going to make _sure_ that his boxers were stolen by Iggy! No wonder he had seemed so cocky this morning! He quickly followed Arthur out of the room, rushing out to the car as he unwrapped one of the burgers he had bought at lunch break. He jumped in the car, ignoring the confused look Arthur shot him. He waited until Arthur was in the car and shutting the door until he took off, speeding through the traffic.

"Bloody hell, Alfred, what was your rush!" Arthur exclaimed, clinging to the seat as they pulled up into the driveway. Alfred just ignored him and went straight into the house. Arthur picked up his papers and followed Alfred into the house. He had barely set them down when Alfred began talking to him.

"So. You haven't seen my boxers, have you?"

"Alfred, I thought we went through this. I have no idea about your 'lucky' drawers."

"That's funny, because…" Alfred stopped and quickly went behind Arthur, giving him a wedgie as he yanked up his boxers. "_These_ are my lucky boxers." He smirked and waited for a response.

"Alfred!" Arthur yelped as a hand yanked up his underwear, squirming uncomfortably. He quickly removed Alfred's hand and pulled them back down, wincing a little. "That hurt."

"You deserve it, thief."

"I am not a thief!"

"Liar."

"I'm not lying! I'm a gentleman, gentlemen don't lie."

"Gentleman?" Alfred scoffed at this.

"Yes. A gentleman."

"I'm pretty sure gentlemen don't wear other guys' boxers."

"I-I…" Arthur sputtered, unable to come up with a response.

Alfred smirked. "So, why'd ya do it? Wanted to get in my pants"

"I- no!" Arthur flushed a deep red.

"Haha, you did!"

"I didn't!" Arthur crossed his arms and turned away. "It's not like that!"

"Aww, come on Artie, you can tell me!"

"It's _Arthur_, not Artie. Get it right, you git."

"Alright, _Aahthuhh."_ Alfred said, mocking Arthur's accent. "I want answers."

"Fine. You left them at my house in the corner, so I thought they became my property. I washed them and decided to wear them, and I wondered when you'd notice they were gone." Arthur turned back around to face Alfred, face slowly returning to its normal color.

"Oh. I did? No wonder I couldn't find them this morning!"

"I thought you looked like a fool…Well, more like one than usual."

"Hey! I resent that!"

"Actually, you resemble it."

"Yeah, that too!"

"…"

"What?"

"Think about what you just said."

"…Oh. OHHH. Hey! That's mean!"

"I only say it because I love you."

"You do?"

"I-I mean, well, that is to say…"

"I love you too, Arthur."

"You what?"

"Love you."

"…"

"Why else do you think I broke away? I couldn't just be your colony anymore, Arthur. I wanted more, but you were too hurt to see that for a long time, so I let you go on believing I hated you and I just watched you from afar."

"But, you always said…"

"Sometimes we don't say what we mean."

"I think that's the most intelligent thing I've heard you say in a long time."

"Hey!" Alfred pulled Arthur close and rested his hands on Arthur's butt. "So, do you _like_ wearing my boxers?"

"Well, they're comfortable." Arthur flushed.

"You could do it more often, you know."

"I think I might." And as Alfred's lips descended on his own, Arthur decided that maybe being a thief and a liar wasn't so bad after all.

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A/N: Sorry about the gooey cheese that's pouring out of the end of this. My Beta reminded me that it wouldn't do to have them pouncing on each other by the end of this, so it basically just because sappy, gooey goodness. And I know that I should be working on Kiss With A Fist (I also know that it's terrible to start a sentence with 'and'), but this is technically a really late birthday present.  
Please Review/Comment! I love to hear from you guys!  
Until Next time  
~Nic


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